Jᴀᴄᴜʀᴜᴛᴜ - Tʜᴇ Cᴀsᴛ Oᴜᴛ

Seriously.

Here's today's entry:

http://sciencefictionmusings.blogspot.c ... erson.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Same softball questions, same self-important answers from TheKevin. Same, same, same, every time. I honestly felt like I'd read this interview before.

I'm thinking he does everything with a template: writes Dune books, goes on hikes, gives interviews, eats, breathes, does nasty stuff I don't want to think about ... it's all done via template.

+++++

One horrifying passage, though: get your favorite vomiting smiley ready:

"We currently have two additional Dune books under contract, The Throne of Dune(2011) and Leto of Dune (2013), but after those books are finished we’re considering going back to the post-Butlerian Jihad time period to talk about the formation of the Great Schools (the Bene Gesserit, the Spacing Guild, the Mentats, the Swordmasters)."

That's right, Kevin, keep milking her until she finally falls over.

(Although, honestly, I'm not sure Bobo's going to capable of much beyond 2013)

Yeah, BoBo's age is starting to show, huh? (All those years of abuse taking their toll?)

Re the interview, has anyone heard of this Ann Wilkes before?

ANN WILKES
I'm a SF author. I write flash, shorts, novels. See full publication credits on my website. On this blog, I interview other SF and FY authors, talk about science fiction, writing or writing science fiction. Publicists and authors may email with interview requests. I also review books for the "beyond reality shelf" at http://mostlyfiction.com" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;.

So who else is dying to know if she contacted him or he "email[ed her] with [an] interview request"?

I’ve published a hundred books, 48 of which have been national or international bestsellers, I’ve won a bunch of awards, but I don’t rest on my laurels.

Nah, he doesn't rest on his laurels. He just flogs the numbers everywhere he can. (48:100 ... that's less than 50% Kev!)

AW: Who encouraged you most when you started writing for publication?

KJA: I had some teachers in high school who were very supportive, and then college friends who were all aspiring writers and we formed a very active support group and workshop. After that, I maintained a circle of friends who offered advice and resources.

I don't think I've seen that particular sound bite before.

AW: Do you have any advice for new writers?

KJA: Be persistent and never stop learning how to improve your craft. Think of having a career as an author along the same lines as being a professional athlete. You don’t just break in after one or two tryouts; you have to work out daily and keep yourself at the top of your form.

...I, for example, keep myself in this totally manly pear shape by hiking almost every day. But since that would represent a ginormous diversion of time away from my work, I take along an IC recorder and dictate a chapter or two while I exercise. My current on-tour diet of beer and pizza is really wreaking hell on my gurlish figure, though! HA HA HA HA!

AW: HA HA HA! HA HA.

SandChigger wrote:So who else is dying to know if she contacted him or he "email[ed her] with [an] interview request"?

My strong suspicion is that TheKevin never turns down an interview request; anyone with a blog can get him to email back some cut-and-paste answers if they just ask. I mean, all kidding aside, the guy gets interviewed by places no one has ever heard of, with URLs like half a mile long.

Whatever the case, KJA grabs the link and gets to flog it at least twice more: he can Twatter about it, and he can blog about it. And, of course, it keeps that ego inflated: the important author is asked to speak again!

Has KJA really published 100 books?

I wonder what he counts as "books"? Magazines that include one of his short stories? Individual issues of comics or graphic novels he contributed to? The Koontz collaboration ... whoops, I guess he's back down to 99 then, right Keith?

HBJ

SandChigger wrote:Yeah, BoBo's age is starting to show, huh? (All those years of abuse taking their toll?)

AW: Who encouraged you most when you started writing for publication?

KJA: I had some teachers in high school who were very supportive, and then college friends who were all aspiring writers and we formed a very active support group and workshop. After that, I maintained a circle of friends who offered advice and resources.

HEY!

Don't edit in things I didn't include when quoting me!



(Remember, I can call your cellphone at 3:00 AM any time I want. )


(Um ... well ... any time that is 3:00 AM, I mean. )

SandChigger wrote:(Remember, I can call your cellphone at 3:00 AM any time I want. )


(Um ... well ... any time that is 3:00 AM, I mean. )

HBJ

Hunchback Jack wrote:Has KJA really published 100 books?

He has not, in fact, done any such thing. A quick glance at his entry at the ISF Database shows maybe 50 or 60 novel-length entries. I didn't count them, but unless I've lost all ability to estimate, I'm not seeing 100.

More Kevin J. Anderson lies, it looks like. And even if he did have 100 books to his credit, about 90 percent of them would be co-authored. Should he really be claiming full credit for doing half of the work?

Most people wouldn't even try. But he is Kevin J. Anderson.

SandChigger wrote:Re the interview, has anyone heard of this Ann Wilkes before?

ANN WILKES
I'm a SF author. I write flash, shorts, novels. See full publication credits on my website. On this blog, I interview other SF and FY authors, talk about science fiction, writing or writing science fiction. Publicists and authors may email with interview requests. I also review books for the "beyond reality shelf" at http://mostlyfiction.com" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;.

So who else is dying to know if she contacted him or he "email[ed her] with [an] interview request"?

First thing that came to my mind was the character from King's Misery. If only fiction would become life in this instance.

Okay, that would rock harder than a three-headed dog.

"Kevin? ... Kevin? ... I'm your number-one fan ..."

Except I think Kevvie would actually enjoy the attention.

Up until the axe came out, anyway.

HBJ,
(book, not movie)

Listening to KJA dispense advice on "writing" is like listening to some death row inmate tell me his thoughts on necrophilia. My skin is crawling just reading KJA pretend to know what he's talking about.

And yet the wannabe's eat it up.

I haven't been by his MySpace page recently to chuckle over all the "Ooh Kevin! Read my new book/poem/haiku/doodle/blog/poo!" messages.

Have to remember to do that again. Real soon!

GamePlayer wrote:My skin is crawling just reading KJA pretend to know what he's talking about.

Couldn't agree more.

What advice could that hack possibly offer? "Keep pounding away at those action scenes! The lowest common denominators LOVE those!" Or maybe, "Be sure to pick a brain-dead, low-self-esteem zombie when you're trying to take over a family's literary legacy!"

What a joke. Kevin J. Anderson knows as much about real writing as I know about playing in the NBA.

Where does this notion come from that just anybody can write a novel, if they could only get around to it?

Um, NaNoWriMo?

No, actually, from reading your posts and statements about your own "work" and methodology!

But somehow, publishing a novel apparently involves nothing more than unskilled labor, stringing a lot of sentences together until you fill enough pages with words.

Exactly what I meant!

Now, I’m not comparing myself to an Olympic gold medalist. I can’t even stay up on ice skates. I don’t change the oil in my car (though I could probably figure it out, “if only I had the time”) or balance the monthly checkbook. But I do have a pretty good idea how to write a novel. I’ve been practicing and training for most of my life.

Um, no Kevin, sorry, but you manifestly DO NOT know how to write a [good] novel.

And as for the last bit, I just have no words. ... Helen Keller trying to become an oil painter? Does that come close to conveying it?


http://www.shadow-writer.co.uk/ifonly.htm" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

He's so amazingly, utterly useless. It just defies description.

And he's lucky to live in a society where doing nothing more than walking around talking into a recorder can result in making a living. That's not the case all across the globe.

This explains his Bitchy Queen act, too. I know a lot of people like KJA: they have absolutely no useful skills of their own, so they lash out at people that do. That's why he's always complaining about the service: he knows, in his heart, that he can't even cook a meal, fix a car, do household repairs, set up a computer, and on and on. So he mocks those who can do these things.

He is a pathetic excuse for a human being.

He can bring home the bac...

Oh, no, she's already there.

Hey !! Look @ the photo !!

He DOES have another Jacket !!

He has TWO jackets?

ZOMGWTFBBQ

That is his Native American name. Babbling Twojackets.

I noticed the new Jacket too. I consider it proof he's a lurker here and has become self-conscious.

Yippe! Can't wait for Bobo and the Hack's original trilogy "Hellhole" and see how many ideas they ripoff from other works.

Then you just got appointed SMELLHOLE admin. Good Luck!

(Who wants to take over on Twitter after I quit later this month? )

Not an interview, but re the current tour, from his latest blahg:

I’m sitting on the train right now, heading from New Haven CT to Manhattan, and then tonight we are off to Long Island, NY for our 7 PM appearance at the Book Revue in Huntington. The past two nights, Brian and I have done signings in small independent bookstores which gave us an opportunity to sit with the fans in a cozy setting and have a relaxed chat (much different from the mobs at San Diego Comic Con).

Small venues, cozy & relaxing? Is there any way to read that besides SMALL TURNOUTS?!

Edit:

Small and evidently somewhat rundown. Notice the peeling paint (on the wall, not BoBo's makeup):

Freakzilla wrote:I noticed the new Jacket too. I consider it proof he's a lurker here and has become self-conscious.

Look closely at the reflection!





(From the same pic as above)

GamePlayer wrote:Listening to KJA dispense advice on "writing" is like listening to some death row inmate tell me his thoughts on necrophilia. My skin is crawling just reading KJA pretend to know what he's talking about.

Ya'll remember the Q&A he did for Writers of the Future a while back? Just the same regurgitated shit over and over again.

Rob