Great Stools of Dune predictions: here we go again!

[lotek]

Deborahsmus!

[SandChigger]

I'll post this here since it isn't directly related to Superdog's horrifying Time Travel suggestion...

I think I saw Byron (or some equivalent idiot) mention January 2012 as the release date for TWISTERHOOD. I wondered this morning if they aren't dragging it out so they can say they spent well over a year on its preparation, the "book a year" pace thus far being another of our well-known complaints.

Never mind that they're doing things the same shitty way as before, and that the actual time spent on the book will probably be no more than any other McDune crap pile. You know they'll peddle August 2010 through late autumn (October or November?) 2011 as the writing & editing period.

Wait and see.

[SandRider]

I think Twisterhood is as done as it's going to be, right now ....

certainly Keith doesn't have anymore "work" to do on it ....

[Freakzilla]

I think I saw Byron (or some equivalent idiot) mention January 2012 as the release date for TWISTERHOOD.

It was in the AnderZone!

[SandChigger]

Was it?

Oh well. Like I said, some equivalent idiot.

[inhuien]

The only deduction I can draw from the scheduling is that they're desperate to distance it from the dire under performance of WoD.

edit for: There, they're, their.

[Freakzilla]

You're traveling through another dimension, a dimension not only of repetition and uneccessary adjectives but of mindlessness; a journey into a another author's land whose boundaries are that of Keith's lack of imagination. That's the signpost up ahead — your next stop, the AnderZone.

[Tleszer]

In the AnderZone* everything is what it appears to be. Imagination need not apply.


*now in Technicolor!

[SandRider]

I'm wondering if the delayed release date is because HOR/Purge finally decided they needed to put a real editor
on Keith's stuff, and they expect to send the MMS back to him for "revision" about a dozen times ?

if that's the case, boy has somebody fucked up there ... can you imagine what Keith'll be twitting about the third time
they send the thing back ? he's THE muthafuckn KAY JAY AY, muthafuckrs !

[edit] because I'm 100% convinced the Twisterhood manuscript is done; or as done as it's going to be;
those three have slobbered over it as much as they can, Keith's already forgotten the details, and Phuzzy's
not sure which book it was they just finished, but they were written with daddy's notes right in front of him ...
[/edit]

or, and even better, they take the MMS, hire a ghost writer, some kid in college, to totally rework the thing, don't tell
Keith or Phuzzy or anybody, release the book after it's had two years of polishing, and finally get some good sales figures
on the McDune - hell, it might be so good, even the OH would approve ...

what would THAT do to Keith's ego ?
would he immediately start twitting that wasn't the book he wrote,
or would he shut up and go with it ? ... eventually to the point of agreeing with
the OH that the earlier books weren't up to anybody's standards ?

and there's a whole new nuDune, ghost written by real, actual writers,
with Keith & the Other Guy's name on them ?

[SandChigger]

No new post-pre-prequel book will never get my approval as long as it's based on the bullshit scenario of the Legends books.




(The Houses were the prequels, the Legends the pre-prequels, and so the Schools are post-pre-prequels.)

[Freakzilla]

You really think he's ever read a book he wrote? I bet he wouldn't even notice.

[SandChigger]

I seem to remember him claiming a while ago he was rereading one of the Legends in preparation for starting TWISTERHOOD... Of course, it could have just been more talk.

[Omphalos]

I seem to remember him claiming a while ago he was rereading one of the Legends in preparation for starting TWISTERHOOD... Of course, it could have just been more talk.

He was probably just rereading the fan letters he got after that was published.

[Freakzilla]

No fucking way, the dude doesn't even edit. I'd like to know what the last real book he read was.

[TheDukester]

You really think he's ever read a book he wrote?

That's an interesting thought ...

I wouldn't be surprised if he hasn't. He's very much an "always moving forward" person; the past is only good for contributing to his statistical totals. I could see him saying, "Re-read? Why? That's in the past, man!"

(Also, stuff like that would cut into his time for DVDs, inane Twatter posts, growlers of Coors Light, and the monthly clothes-off session with Becky)

[Sev]

So what happened to a 2012 release for this? - Amazon in the U.K. have a page now up for 'Sisterhood' and have got the release date as September 2011

Here's the synopsis:

It is 83 years after the last of the thinking machines were destroyed in the Battle of Corrin, after Faykan Butler took the name of Corrino and established himself as the first Emperor of a new imperium. The great war hero Vorian Atreides has turned his back on politics and Salusa Secundus, flying off to parts unknown; because he was given a life-extension treatment by Agamemnon, he ages very slowly. Abulurd Harkonnen, convicted of cowardice during the Battle of Corrin, was sent away in disgrace to live on the gloomy planet Lankiveil, and his descendants continue to blame Vor for the downfall of their fortunes. Raquella Berto-Anirul has formed the Bene Gesserit School on the jungle planet Rossak as the first Reverend Mother. The descendants of Aurelius Venport and Norma Cenva have built a powerful transportation company, the Venport Spacing Fleet, using mutated, spice-saturated Navigators who fly "spacefolder ships" (precursors of Heighliners). Gilbertus Albans, the ward of the hated Erasmus, has established his own school on the bucolic planet of Lampadas where he teaches humans to become Mentats. Even so, many decades after the defeat of the thinking machines, anti-technology fervor continues to sweep across the human-settled planets, with powerful fanatical groups imposing violent purges...

[SandChigger]

It still could be a January/February release in the States, but Amazon UK has proven to be more on the ball on these things.

Ugh. What a bunch of crap.

"with powerful fanatical groups imposing violent purges..."

That's going to be their lead-in to the C.E.T., wait and see.

Time to blog and update the predictions pages!

[SandChigger]

Well, I've just flitted over "across the pond" and HAD MY WAY with the tags on the Twizzerhood page.

How's this for starters?

Your tags: travesty, abomination, willful misunderstanding of canon, mcdune, not dune, glorified but horrible fan fiction, legacy rape, franchise abuse

[SandRider]

so ... wait .... like, three-quarters of the "synopsis" for the new book is recap of the last book ?

or like, the last book in this ... umm .... this ... shit, I just can't come up with anymore derogatory & mocking phrases for Keith's babblings .....
but lord, how many ... uh ... "stories", for lack of a better, more hateful word, have been churned out since the pretards last saw Voltron Atreides,
and Fakin' Butler and Abbalard Harkonnen and mild mannered taxi-driver Anthony Morton "Tony" Micelli, an average goomba who on his days off
takes his cab to Connecticut to tag team an uptight white protestant woman and her mother, that crazy bitch from "Soap", and Skippy the
Wonder Dog ???

and so ... and so if 800 of the 810 "chapters" in this new ... uh ... thing is going to re-tell the ... uh ... "story" from all the other,
preceding ... things ... does that mean that Keith thinks his ... uh ... "readers" ... are too stoopid to remember the details (and he
would be RIGHT!) or does he think that they, like himself, would never go back and re-read a book ?

and doesn't this just give him a couple hundred new pages to contradict himself ?

[SandChigger]

Yes.

And it's going to be FABULOUS!

[Hunchback Jack]

It's shaping up to be the Dune equivalent of the Star Wars prequel trilogy. Really.

Remember how in the prequel trilogy, everything was deliberately designed to look like the precursor of what was in the originals? Like the star fighters that Anakin and Obi Wan flew around in had characteristics of x-wings and tie fighters, clone troopers looked a bit like stormtroopers, the big-ass troop carriers looked like smaller versions of Star Destroyers, etc.

Well, this trilogy will be just like that. There are going to be dozens of little details that KJA won't be able to resist putting in, that will be obvious precursors of what came later. Of *everything* that came later. And KJA will think it's just so cool.

And the story will suck.

HBJ

[SandChigger]

I don't know... I'm starting to think we're going to have to come up with a new way of saying "suck", because the word just doesn't cover the kind of mega-ultra-vacuum this thing looks to be shaping up into.


Edit: Also, I was thinking this morning, they've purportedly finished the first draft and are now in the "swapping spit & shit" mutual-masturbatory* stage of their "process", so we still have time to get stuff out and on record before they've declared it finished.

COME ON, PEOPLE, GET THOSE BRAINS WORKING AND THINK NASTY!



* Oh, come on, they're supposedly tugging at each other's junk. What would YOU call it?

[Omphalos]

How do you encapsulate the idea "that thing sucks so bad its got its own gravity well," into one word?

[Serkanner]

How do you encapsulate the idea "that thing sucks so bad its got its own gravity well," into one word?

It sucks like Linda Lovelace?

[SandRider]

How do you encapsulate the idea "that thing sucks so bad its got its own gravity well," into one word?

we call it "Dallas" ...